This weekend I had the pleasure of being in the presence of some AMAZING power couples (some who are currently earning 6 figures a month) and what impressed me more than their business success was how they treated each other. I’m talking about the random back rubs during our 3-hour sessions, the public praise, secret smiles, and the way they gave each other credit for their success really touched me. It also made me realize that I have not been doing a good job of respecting my husband and showing him the love he deserves, so here are 3 ways that I’m going to change that starting TODAY:
1) Control My Facial Expressions
When my husband says something that I don’t agree with, or something that I don’t understand, my face almost always shows my disapproval/disgust. Whether it’s an eye-roll or my signature “mom look” these faces probably communicate that I think his thought/idea is stupid and I’m sure this is the reason he doesn’t share things with me as often as I’d like. So, no more eye-rolling, scowls, pursed lips or death stares – I’m just going to smile instead (and not that “crazy I’m going to kill you” smile but the “I love you no matter what you say” smile).
2) Show Appreciation
Starting today I am going to work on saying “Thank you!” when my husband does something for me, regardless of what it is or how I’m feeling. I’ve realized that I only say thank you when I’m in a good mood AND when what he’s done is a big deal (like changing his work schedule so that I can attend a 4-day conference in Las Vegas). Anyone can be grateful for big things, but a wise woman is grateful for the small things also. So, whether it’s cooking dinner or picking up some toys from the floor, I’ll be showing appreciation for things both big and small because I really DO appreciate my husband for all that he does.
3) Stop Correcting
Sometimes I treat my husband like one of my children instead of the man I chose to be my life partner (and yes, it’s taking me a lot to admit that). If I think he’s not changing the baby’s diaper correctly, then I’ll let him know. If I think he’s holding her bottle wrong, then I show him how I would do it. When I don’t like the way he’s playing with the boys, I tell him and provide him with some alternatives. When he contradicts himself, I make sure I repeat back EXACTLY what he said while restating my point to win an argument. But starting today, I’m going to stop correcting him (unless there is a significant safety risk involved) and allow him to ask me for my help if he feels he needs it. Instead, I’m going to go back to #2 above and find something to appreciate about the situation.
Every day I’m learning more and more about how to be a great wife, and now that I’m finally taking responsibility for some of the challenges that I’ve been facing, I KNOW that things will begin changing for the better…..and I’m so excited because #MyMarraigeMatters